I Don't Need To Be Preached To

Hello. I'm Adaline. I'm Catholic, 5' 5", and I like band guys with tattoos. 
What's that? Did I just state my religion? 
Yes, I did. 

I recently received an email, from a reader asking me what Kelsey and I thought about religion. If you follow me on Google +, you know the basis of this story, but I'm going to go completely into the details of it, in order to hopefully get a point across. 

After finding out the emailer was a reader, I went ahead and told her what I believe in. 
I take the title of Catholic as my religion, though to be honest, I believe in a mixture of the actual religion, and my own views and thoughts. I don't believer same sex marriage is a sin, and I support all sexualities, and people who are gender-fluid/trans. 
I told the girl this, and a little while later, she sent back what I'd been expecting all along. 
What was entailed in the email was a very long speech, aided by Bible passages, telling me how gay marriage was in fact a sin (The day I think this is the day you can promptly throw me out of an airplane), that Catholics are not saved by Christ (read threat above), and that I should think long and hard about what I believe in. 

After that, I also received a separate email with a video titled,"2 Roosters Don't Make An Egg," which was a lovely video made by some nice homophobic country people singing about how God said,"Love the brother; but I don't think he meant it that way." 

I am fully aware what sex is. I know it takes a man and a woman to have a child. I am not five. 

I also know people of the same gender can still go at it, if they so please. Might not be able to make anything out of it, but they can adopt, and help reduce the number of orphans in the world. 

 So, I replied back to the email, politely thanking the reader for ruining my morning and giving me a sermon that I didn't need. I told her that I didn't see why I couldn't believe what I wanted to believe in, while she did the same, and we just kept our beliefs to ourselves and lived happily ever after. 

She replied back a little while ago with the picture below. 



I wasn't sure the conversation could get anymore immature, but wow, I was wrong. 

She asked me where my proof was that she was wrong on her views. Do I have proof of this? No. You know why? Because I never said she was wrong in her views. 

"I believe what I believe, you believe what you believe, and it's as simple as that. Nothing you could try to say would make me want to change who I am." 

Did I say anything about her being wrong? No. 

Did I express my annoyance at her trying to make me think about my religion and whether or not my religion was right, and if was saved? Yes. 

I have nothing against people who want to preach their religion to others. I think it's great that someone can have such a love for something that they want to share it with others. You want to know what I don't like though?! 

I don't like the people who try to change others. I don't like those who harass people like me who have already got a religion, already have beliefs, and are perfectly content with what they believe in. I do not understand why people cannot just leave others and their religion alone. 

If you want to "recruit"/"save" more people with your religion, then all I ask is that you find people who are willing to either join your religion, or convert from their old one. Don't try to tell me I'm wrong in what I believe in. Don't tell me I'm not saved. Has that ever really worked on somebody? Have you told somebody they're wrong and watched their eyes widen as they go,"You know what? I'm stupid. You're right. Let me cast aside everything I believe in, so, according to your religion, I can be saved."? I highly doubt it. And if you have; congratulations. But that certainly won't work on people like me. 

I believe what I believe in. That is it. Plain, and simple. 

I don't care if you think I'm wrong. 

I don't care if you think I'm going to Hell. 

And I most certainly don't care about your homophobic farm musical you found on YouTube. 

I might have been less mad about all of this if she hadn't said,"This is not a 'both are right,' thing." 
It is a 'both are right' thing. Because as I've reiterated so many times before: I believe what I believe in and to me, I am right. And to you, you are right. Your way, is not the overall right choice. Especially when it comes down to a subject such as religion. 

Here's a thought-- Before you try and tell somebody their religion is wrong, maybe you should ask them; "Hey, are you interested in hearing how *insert religion here* views things?" If they say yes, proceed to tell them politely about your beliefs. Don't tell them they're wrong. Because guess what? Your religion, is not the world's. Not everybody is going to view things the same way as you do; that's just the way society works. 

xo Adaline 

I wasn't going to post this because I felt it'd be immature to do considering it addresses a reader but I am truly not okay with what happened, and I know this is an issue in the world; I've been meaning to address this for a while. 


Comments

  1. *FRANTICALLY GESTURES TO POST*
    *TOPPLES OVER BACKWARDS BECAUSE OF WHEELING ARMS*
    All I can say is YES, YES, YES.
    Also. that I'm technically Catholic too, and I can very much relate to/agree with your views on gender, marriage, etc.
    Also that this post is an extremely epic thing.
    I'm going to go find a safe place to wheel my arms now.

    - Ellie

    P.S. "I need chill pills but I'm not going to take them" is officially the best label ever.

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  2. you already know where i stand in this, but it's a very important topic that i can't keep quiet about.

    i'm athiest--i believe in the thoery of evolution, and i believe that when i die i'll be six feet underground and there I shall remain. no heaven nor hell for me. i feel very strongly about this, but do not feel the need whatsoever to go and strike up conversation with my friends that believe in something different (whatever religion that may be) and tell them about how they're wrong in their beliefs. i think that same-sex marriage is a wonderful thing, because love is love, and love is freaking great. i may disagree with others' opinions on the topic, but i don't lecture them. i don't try to persuade them to change their opinions. and i agree, yes, the idea of being so passionate about something that you want to go share your religion with others to "save" them is great! just don't try to force someone that is already content in their own religious beliefs. and the whole "this is not a 'both are right' thing" downright disgusts me, because last time i checked, everyone's different, unique, and entitled to their own opinion. so don't tell me that your beliefs trump mine. it's simple as that. i just wished that some people would understand that. -_-

    -maddie

    p.s. what ellie said. it really is the best label ever.

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    1. Omygohd thank you Maddie. I am agnostic and am surrounded by religious friends. Just wondering, do you get in trouble for asking valid questions that they cannot answer about their own religion?
      Also, love this post. Just...Thank you.
      E xox

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    2. haha, you've got nothing to thank me for--thank adi. :} no, i don't, mainly because me and my group of friends make and effort to exclude religion from our conversations. sorry. :/

      -m

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  3. YES. YES. YES. yes.

    If you don't believe in same-sex marriage, then that's your opinion. You don't need to go and tell the whole world, you could make many people unhappy or upset. God also said that we should be nice and kind to people and if same-sex marriage is a sin, then I think making people upset is also a sin.

    I'm Muslim and whenever people talk about their beliefs (that are completely different from mine) I don't feel the need to argue or lecture them. Sure, I don't agree but that doesn't mean that I should argue.

    There was no reason for that girl to start arguing with you, that was just rude.

    Lovely post!
    ~Noor

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  4. I love this! This is beautiful.

    I believe in a whole mishmash of things too (and my opinions change the more I learn and wonder), and you made some incredibly spot on points in here. Bravo, Addie!

    This is just...beautiful. I don't have any other words for it. :)

    ~Mary Hannah

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  5. Adi, you have no idea how much I relate to this. My friends are all a different religion than me (for their sake, I will not say which), and for the past couple years,they have been trying to get me to participate in their church activities. The thing is that I have absolutely no problem with their religion, no problem at all. I have a problem with them trying to thrust their religion on me. I am much like you; I don't attend church on a regular basis, but I certainly consider myself a Christian. And while I am a Christian, I wholeheartedly support equal marriage rights; always have, always will. None of my friends agree with this, but I don't care.

    It is simply unacceptable that someone would send you something like this. It's not okay for them to try to thrust their beliefs upon you; after all, you are your own person. And for standing up to them, I applaud you.
    *applauds*
    ~Ginny

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  6. Holy moly in a jar - YES. I was raised Christian and I use the label, but my family has never been heavily religious. We believe in God and Jesus etc. and in the versions of them that just want to see you be the best person that you can be, and who don't plan on sending you to Hell because you swear or you're gay.

    My family swears often, we don't care what your sexuality is (and we don't think it's our business to be telling you even if we did care), and we stopped going to church years ago because of the people who can't stand to let us have our own beliefs. We will do our very best to respect your religion, views, and opinions - but only for so long as you respect ours. There are sooo many different religions out there, and they all seem to contradict each other in some way; one says do this and you'll be guaranteed a spot in the sky, and another says the exact same thing will send you to its version of eternal Hell. If your faith is strong, more power to you - but PLEASE don't start preaching to me about how I'm doomed if I don't have the exact same faith. Don't try to convert me if I'm not willing. All that does is make me drift farther away!

    It's great to be curious and ask about someone's religion, but she went about it in a very disrespectful and predictable way. There's no need for all of that.. Oh well. Sorry you had to go through that - it can be so frustrating. FYI, Adi, might just be my computer but I can't see your image! :o

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  7. Adi, you always impress me with your eloquincy. I don't like to talk to people about religion, but this post tempted me so I figured I would. I am a Catholic too, and I believe that my relationship with God is a personal thing. Which is why I never question or try to change my friends who don't share my beliefs. Similarly to you, I have some of my own beliefs outside of my religion. I am not against gay people, and I believe that bullying and discriminating people for their sexuallity is a sin. The bible tells us to treat other people the way you want to be treated, and that is what I strive to do.

    ~ Mint

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    1. Exactly. I believe that for most people (including myself and obviously you) religion is a highly personal experience, and people oughtn't to go barging in uninvited to take that away or tear apart something that is very important to some people's inner core and existence.

      - Ellie

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  8. YOU WONDERFUL CHILD. I'm so sorry I couldn't contain myself. :') This post is incredible, it's been my thoughts for the last couple of days because I received emails for my homosexuality post I wrote ages ago. And there was a person who tried to convert me on my blog as well. Do they think I'll slap my forehead and immediately change my solid beliefs? You're ABSOLUTELY right!

    I'm an athiest, which is not to say I don't 'understand' Christianity. I have read the Bible back to front twice and am planning to read the Quaran to get a good knowledge of world religions. If Christian fundamentalists want to get analytical about it...the Bible has points we can all agree on. First is that we all sin. Why do people feel the need to target not-hetero people and call out their 'sin'? Because if everyone is a sinner, then that person should also be technically going around and calling out everyone as sinners. I believe that it's sheer prejudice, because the second thing that we can universally agree on is that the Bible's key message is to love.

    I believe it's okay to share one's beliefs and argue, but if your intention is to convert someone who has no desire to convert, then I agree that their wishes should be respected. All in all, a brilliant post. :)

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  9. Can I please make you president of the entire world? Please! The world would be in such a better place if you could lead us and teach us your views. I seriously want to jump through this screen and give you a gigantic hug. :) This post should be mandatory to read in school. Who cares about textbooks! Let's read Adaline's insanely-inspirational blog that everyone can learn from!

    I am loosely Christian. I don't go to church, I don't read the bible, I don't pray to God, and I don't go to CCD. I have friends who do, but they respect that I'm not very religious. If one of my friends says something bad, one of my other friends will tell them to apologize to God and beg Him for His forgiveness (jokingly). But they never tell me to do that because I don't go to church. They never try to force their religious ways onto anyone else, including me. This is where that girl went wrong. I understand if she didn't understand what you believe in, but she shouldn't have bashed your beliefs. I live in America, which it's stated in your rights as a citizen that you can practice whatever religion you want and believe whatever you desire. It's one thing to state what you believe in. In fact, I find different religions to be fascinating! (That's also cause I'm a nerd.) However, do not tell me what I believe in is wrong. Who honestly knows if God is real? (Plot twist-- Zeus is going to take over the world with Poseidon and Hades!) Maybe God doesn't exist. Maybe God is a girl. There is no proof that a higher, superior being (God) exists. So, it is possible that you are right. It's possible I'm right. It's possible that girl is right in her beliefs too. However, no one's thoughts should be bashed, and no one should be forced to believe something they don't want to.

    Oh, and I'm right with you with gay marriage. #loveislove

    ~Jennifer Whyskers

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  10. I'm a Cristian but I haven't gone to church since I was 5. My mom and dad teach me almost completely different stuff than what I vaguely remember learning. I used to learn all about God and Jesus. Now... not so much. I have talked about religion with my friends, like, once in my life. And that was because an annoying girl was trying to convert me to being a Mormon (I have nothing against Mormons, but I just don't want to be one). Other than that, we never talk about religion.
    I also agree on the same sex marriage thing. Be happy and love who you want to love.
    I love this post.

    ~Emily

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  11. Oh hey, I'm a Catholic too!
    I completely agree with you. Being Christian doesn't mean every Christian person has the same views, you all believe in God, but that doesn't mean you all believe in the way to live. Personally, my church is pretty welcoming to everyone's choices, as is my family. Does it actually say in the Bible that you can't marry the same gender? If people want to stay all traditional, that's their choice, but the rest of the world will be a step ahead of them. One of the Ten Commandments even says to be kind to your neighbors, and they certainly aren't. If people can let the Amish be, then they can stop hating on gay people. If people can't say their opinion without hurting anyone, they should learn to.
    (oops, that was long wasn't it? ><)

    -Claire

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  12. Ugh, she was peeing me off just reading your G+ posts about it.
    Sorry love, but you have to realise this is the 21st century, and PEOPLE HAVE DIFFERENT BELIEFS. This is not medieval England where if you weren't Christian you'd be exiled and sentenced to an eternity of hell. (that's directed to her, not you Adi xD)
    I'm an atheist, and like Jo pointed out, that doesn't mean I don't understand other religions. I went to a Christian primary school (from age 4 to 11) and most of my friends are Hindu and Sikh. Plus religious education is required by law in the UK, so I'm not clueless.
    Basically, I don't believe that a God exists, or not in the way most religions do. I believe in science, but I do like to think that there's someone or something looking out for me and leading me down certain paths, a bit like God. But, that doesn't matter. You're right, I'm right, she's right, everyone's right in terms of their religious beliefs.
    Why did she even ask you if all she was going to do was criticize you and what you believe?
    Charlotte

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  13. Wow, this was pretty great, Adaline! I'm not saying that I believe everything you believe, but that's ok. We all believe in different things and have our own opinions. And I respect people who have their own opinions.

    And the reader who sent you that email was wrong. Wrong to say all those things, we all have the right to believe and say what we're like. And if she really wanted to get you to believe what she did and convert to her religion, she shouldn't have said that to you. I mean who would want to convert to someone else's religion if thats the way they come across--rude, hateful and very disrespectful.

    It was very interesting to see what you believe (more of us should do that more often). And I'de looove to see more posts like this :).

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  14. ADI FOR PRESIDENT 2036 WHO'S WITH ME
    Also technically you already won the argument because that meme she sent you is ridiculously outdated. I mean, honestly - if you're going to be ignorant, at least belittle me with a relatively modern picture.
    But in all seriousness, I couldn't agree more. The God I believe in loves everyone, no matter their sexual orientation or gender identity. You handled the situation so maturely and eloquently. It's ridiculously difficult to carry on conversations with people who's main point is, "Respect my belief to disrespect your beliefs." Positively infuriating. You dealt with this with such tact and I'm so proud of you.
    As someone who supports love in all its shapes and sizes, I salute you. <3
    ~Oli

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    1. *raises hand and jumps up and down* ME ME I'M WITH YA ALL THE WAY

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    2. I'm totally with you. Except Adi needs to be president now.

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  15. You tell em', Adaline! ^__________^
    I, myself don't have a religion, either does my family.. But I guess I believe and worship Zeus so that counts. And I'm 100% serious when I say that. But that's not even that is strict. And she shouldn't have said those things to you.

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  16. "homophobic farm musical" I'm crying

    my favorite thing is when someone whom I've never even spoken before comes up and verbally accosts me because I believe differently than them (*inserts "true story" meme which is about as old as meme from post*)

    for me, if someone approaches me on gay marriage, I just change the subject--I can always see someone who just wants to either pick a fight or change my opinion because it's "wrong" and "stupid" from a mile away.

    O | Life as a Young Lady

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  17. Yes yes yes! I totally agree with all of this, and I have pretty much the same beliefs that you do. I don't have anything insightful to add, but I think that that person was wrong to say those things to you. If they don't believe the same things you do, that's fine, but they had no right to bother you and insult you like that ♥
    Amy xx

    Little Moon Dragon

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  18. I agree 100% with this. It's not right to tell people their beliefs are wrong. Everyone has their own beliefs and you should never have been bothered.

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  19. Hello Adaline!
    I'm very sorry to hear about this. I am a strong Christian (non denominational), who also strongly believes that same-sex marriage is, in fact, a sin, but I was appalled by the way you were treated. I always get insanely mad whenever I hear of people being immature and mean in telling people what they believe.

    One thing I must mention, though, is that you said "I have nothing against people who want to preach their religion to others. I think it's great that someone can have such a love for something that they want to share it with others." But then you went on to say: "I don't like the people who try to change others. I don't like those who harass people like me who have already got a religion, already have beliefs, and are perfectly content with what they believe in. I do not understand why people cannot just leave others and their religion alone." Every person who believes something is going to want to get people to change, that is just how it is. Everyone wants to make everyone in the world think that their religion is the right one. And honestly, I have been harassed like that the most by the gay community, but I'm not going to get into that.
    I do agree that it is not at all right to harass others and basically force our religion down other people's throat, but also helping people find Jesus is what we, as Christians are called to do. My heart aches and aches for the people who don't know the intense, amazing real love of Jesus, and I want to be able to help them find Him. So, yes, I want people to change, I want people to believe in my religion, but not because I want to rub it in their face that I was right and they were wrong. People call me a hater, but that is far from the truth. I deeply love people, and that's why I want them to believe what I believe.
    There's my two cents.

    Again, I am very sorry this happened to you, and I hope it won't happen like this again.

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